Learn & Profit...from the World's Worst Online Marketing
Numbskull PPC Company Draining Client’s Money
Oh, this one really twists my niblets. Imagine idiot PPC companies draining the coffers of big-ass companies like Kodak - sure, that’s bad enough. Now imagine a PPC management company blowing the money of a small-time Scottsdale Arizona based dentist Artemiz Adkins…and it’s downright sinful.
Names of the guilty shall remain anonymous. But look - you […]
Rich Jerk is an AdWords Jerk
The Advice
Lay off the Google AdWords fraud, please.
Why?
What an idiot. First, I was mortified at the ad copy here. I won’t even waste the time checking Google AdWords Terms and Conditions, but I’ll wager that “Clickbank Got Me Laid” and “hookers” are not allowable.
But that’s not all — as we advertisers like to say.
I clicked […]
Butthead Advertiser “Calls Out” Potential Customers? I Think Not.
The Advice
Do not patronize or “call out” your visitors like this butthead advertiser did.
Why?
Oh brother. This one scrapes the bottom. Just when I think I’ve seen the worst, it’s gets even worse. That’s why Online Marketing Hell can never go out of business. Too much subject matter out there.
So I was engaged in one of […]
AdWords Keyword Bracket Insanity for Google Payload Affiliate
The Advice
In AdWords, square brackets [ …] mean exact match and do not go in the title.
Why?
Google Payload is a piece of sh*t 97 page e-book that purportedly tells you how to conduct traffic arbitrage on third-tier PPCs. But that’s for another day.
Keyword Brackets (#1)
What’s this all about? Whenever I see this I can only […]
Build a Niche Store Profits Gone? “Account Suspended”
The Advice
Watch your PPC every day - like a hawk. And pay your hosting bills, too.
Why?
Build a Niche Store is one of my favorite pieces of software that I unfortunately have no time to ever play with. It lets you build Ebay affiliate stores and automatically populate them with products. BANS has a great affiliate […]
Nonsense AdWords Copy - Corporate Meatheaddery at its Finest
Advice
Don’t type in PPC placeholder text and never get back to the ad. And watch your PPC management company!
Why?
On one of my sites, this Google AdWords Content ad showed up one day. What on earth is going on here?
I surmise Business Week’s PPC person or company typed in a bunch of nonsense “lorem ipsum” text […]
Google’s Wet Dream - PPC Poetry
Advice
For PPC, give us an answer to our question on the landing page - within 5 seconds of the click.
Why?
Google content ads appear alongside your Gmail when you have an open message. God only knows what email I had open that displayed this ad for Flowers of Bad.
Hmm. ”False Translation.” Sounds interesting. On the Flowers of Bad landing […]
Google’s Squeeze Pages and Nepotism
Advice
Hey Google: send ads to relevent landing pages. Try your Optimize Ads on Your Blog page. That’s got to be better. And Google, if you need help - I suggest you read something called the AdWords Help Center.
Why?
Google AdWords hates ads that lead to squeeze pages, right? Well, search for “make money blogging.”
Top position numero uno, […]
AdSense Arbitrage: In Praise of Former Arbitrageurs
Advice
WiseGeek make even greater efforts at transforming into a real website.
Why?
It wasn’t the other day when until I wanted to know the temperature of space that I ran across our old arbitrage buddies, WiseGeek. “Back in the day” of fast and frenzied AdSense arbitrage, WiseGeek reigned as the best of the arbitrageurs pushing traffic from […]
Worst PPC in Universe Called to Judgement
Advice
Use third tier and lower PPCs only to expand your PPC reach - not as an alternative to reputable PPCs. Or better - don’t use them.
Why?
You can waste money either of two ways. Drop your cash in a big pile, douse it with lighter fluid, and drop a lighted match on it. Or you can use […]
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